


Best Jelly Beans After All

by jkkitty



Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-14
Updated: 2017-04-14
Packaged: 2018-10-18 15:07:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10619469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jkkitty/pseuds/jkkitty
Summary: Lindafishes prompt from Live Journal MFUWSS Easter Egg Challenge:  I'd like a gen story with Jellybelly beans as the prompt. I know it's an anachronism as they weren't around in the 60"s but what the heck?   Sorry guys, couldn’t do just a regular Easter Egg so here’s my Ostrich Easter Egg.It’s 1966 and the Mini Jelly Bean jelly bean is interfering with one of Thrush’s activities and needs to be put out of busy.   Napoleon and Illya attempt to stop them.





	

 

Napoleon and Illya walked around the Herman Goelitz Candy factory in Oakland, California.   Since the company expanded in 1965 to include Mini Jelly Belly jelly bean trouble had started with the near-by Soors Candy Factory by taking away business from its neighbor factory.

Dressed as typical tourists the cameras around their necks had an automatic feature that allowed continuous pictures to be taken as they walked around. 

At first, no one had notice of the problems that began to pop up for the Goelitz new produce until several people had become sick after eating the new mini jelly bean.   Further checking by UNCLE found that Thrush was the primary owner of the competition, and using their candy deliveries to distribute weapons to third world countries where they were attempting to get a foothold.  When Soor’s business started to dropped off, Thrush decided to destroy their competition.  

UNCLE became involved, and now Napoleon and Illya started their investigation at Goelitz.After the tour, the men walked toward their car, as Napoleon threw Candy Corn and mini Jelly Bellies in his mouth.  

“Are you not afraid those are jelly beans might be poisoned to discourage people from buying them?” Illya asked climbing into his seat. Napoleon offered the bag of candy to his partner as he climbed into the car and threw

After the tour, the men walked toward their car, as Napoleon threw Candy Corn and mini Jelly Bellies in his mouth.   “Are you not afraid those are jelly beans might be poisoned to discourage people from buying them?” Illya asked climbing into his seat. Napoleon offered the bag of candy to his partner as he climbed into the car and threw

“Are you not afraid those are jelly beans might be poisoned to discourage people from buying them?” Illya asked climbing into his seat.

Napoleon offered the bag of candy to his partner as he climbed into the car and threw the second bag of candy in the back seat.  “No, I’m not afraid it’s poison.  You don’t have to eat them if you’re afraid.”  Illya popped a couple of beans into his mouth.  

“What is it that makes these so special?”“Oh, you poor man with such common taste.  It is the gourmet of jelly beans with its center of natural flavoring.

”Rolling his eyes, Illya turned toward the front as Napoleon pulled out.  

Neither of them noticed the man throwing his cigarette out on the ground. He then pulled out what looked like a cigarette pack and talking into it.

……

The line wasn’t long, so they men were able to quickly join the tour at Soors.  When they approached the door with a no admittance sign, they slipped through it. 

“Let’s head this way,” Napoleon suggested.

“Do you have a reason, Napoleon?” “Two years senior, more experience.”  

Rolling his eyes, Illya followed his partner.

As they turned the corner, both found themselves surrounded. 

“Don’t do anything stupid Mr. Kuryakin or Mr. Solo.”  A booming voice came from the ceiling.  “Kindly drop your guns.

”“The voice of God?” Napoleon looked up and asked as he dropped his gun.

“Take our guest to their room, please.  And strip them down to their skivvies.  I prefer no surprises.”

Once they removed their clothes that thrown into a corner, they were bound and pushed into an eight-foot tall container.  A moment later jelly beans began tumbling on them.'

A big blob of a man stood above them.  “Well, gentlemen it seems you have met your demise.   I’m sure you never thought you would be suffocated by jellybeans.   We have guns to ship out so don’t have time to gorge on your conversation. Good-bye and sweet dreams.”  Laughing wildly, the man and his men left the two to their fate.

Frustrated, Illya muttered, “More experience you said,”

With an embarrassed grin, Napoleon asked.  “Did they leave you with anything to help us out here?”

Sarcastically and with an eye roll Illya replied, “I have lost all but my but my shorts. What do you think?”

“Sarcasm doesn’t become you, Illya.  We could always eat our way of this predicament,” Napoleon kidded.With that, Illya started to pull the edging off with underwear.   Soon he had a long, strong piece of thin rope that he made a lasso with and soon had it over a lever on top. The jelly beans had reached their waist and with some help from Napoleon, he was able to pull himself up.  

At the top, he looked back at his partner who was almost buried up to his shoulder with beans.“Would you like help up?”  Illya smirked.

“Any time now would be appreciated,” Napoleon called up.

Pulling his partner up, Illya complained as he reached the top.  “You need to lose some weight.

”“I’m not overweight,” the American huffed.

“If you say so.   Grab a hand full of jelly beans,” Illya instructed once more rolling his eyes.  

"You know if you keep rolling your eyes like that they'll freeze that way."  Napoleon shot back.

Laughing Illya began to stomp on them making a jell.   Not knowing why but aware that Illya had a plan, Napoleon joined his partner. 

“This stuff is ruining my leather shoes.”  Napoleon moan

.“Just keep crushing the beans,” Illya ordered.

After the pile had turned into jell, Illya picked up a handful of it, indicating Napoleon should do the same, They proceeded to shove it into the machines works.   Quickly the machine began choking and smoking.  

Grabbing their clothes, the two ran out the door just as the machine exploded.   As they watched and dressed, it wasn’t long before other explosions were heard. 

“Do you think we destroyed all the guns?”  Illya covered his head as beans rained down on him.

Climbing into the car, Napoleon said; “At least enough that we put a halt to this factory for a while.  Come on let’s call in and head home.” Napoleon glanced over at his partner, who was throwing Jelly Belly jelly beans into his mouth and shivered.

“How can you eat those after what we went through?”

With a wicked grin, Illya threw more into his mouth.  “They are the best jelly beans after all.”

With a groan, Napoleon put the car in gear and headed toward the airport.


End file.
